Professional Pickup Lines
Medical Doctor Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines for Medical Doctors
My sudden protracted cardiac arrhythmia makes me think I'm falling for you.
(Hold out a stethoscope) Why don’t you listen to your heart and go out with me?
My adductor isn't the only thing that's longus.
I wish I was your coronary artery, so that I could be wrapped around your heart.
Is your name Osteoporosis? Because you're giving me a serious bone condition.
Trust me, this is how they did Mammograms back in the old days.
Is your name Flecainide? Because I think you just made my heart skip a beat.
Are you a pulmonary embolism? 'Cause I can't breathe when I'm around you.
(Look for any small skin imperfection) Has anyone ever looked at that? Why don’t we go back to my place so I can give you a full exam?
When you walked in the door your beauty hit me so hard that I have a priapism from all the trauma.
How about we ditch this joint and go study some anatomy?
Baby, you make me vasodilate!
No that's not an epi-pen in my pants, I'm just happy to see you.
Hey baby, wanna play with my corpus cavernosum?
That pulsation in my femoral sheath isn't coming from an artery.
I am an organ donor, need anything?
Come into my office and take off your pants .
Lawyer Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines for Lawyers
Why don't you take a look at my briefs?
I believe that it's in our best interest to comply with section 69 of the act.
I'd have to plead insanity if I ever left you.
If loving you is a crime, then I'm looking at a life sentence.
Excuse me, are you into reverse bifurcation?
When I think of you, I become fully vested.
I've got a precedent that's long and deep.
Is your estate subject to open?
I don't know if I have standing, but I'd love to court you.
I'll teach you about jurisdiction if we change the venue to my place.
I think I'd be liable for negligence if I neglected to come over and talk to you.
How about coming back to my place for a little actus reus?
There is no burden of proof for how fine you are.
I love you beyond a reasonable doubt.
Let me show you my mens rea.
When I bring an ejectment action, there'll be nothing quiet about your enjoyment.
'Res ipsa loquitur', honey. Your hot body speaks for itself!
Your body is 'ultra vires', it's beyond my power to control myself around you.
Stock Market Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines about the Stock Market
Baby, the way you support free markets stimulates growth in my private sector!
Baby, you're not an option... you're totally a future!
I hope you're a bear, cause I'm going to go down on you.
You must be fiscally irresponsible because I'm feeling inflationary pressure in my pants.
Girl, are you a stock? Because you sure like bouncing a lot!
I want to restructure you.
You're a hot commodity .
You look like a successful business woman, because you really know how to position yourself for me.
Computer geek Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines for Computer Geeks
Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for.
You make my software turn into hardware!
Is your name Wi-fi? Because I'm really feeling a connection.
Are you sitting on the F5 key? Cause your ass is refreshing.
You had me at "Hello World."
Want to see my HARD Disk? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.
You can put a Trojan on my Hard Drive anytime.
You still use Internet Explorer? You must like it nice and slow.
I hope you're an ISO file, because I'd like to mount you.
My servers never go down... but I do!
My 'up-time' is better than BSD.
Are you an angel, because your texture mapping is divine!
You've stolen the ASCII to my heart.
Are you a computer keyboard? Because you're my type.
You got me stuck on Caps Lock, if you know what I mean.
If you were a web browser, you'd be called a Fire-foxy lady
How about we do a little peer-to-peer saliva swapping?
Mind if I run a sniffer to see if your ports are open?
Your beauty rivals the graphics of Call of Duty.
You must be Windows 95 because you've got me feeling so unstable.
I was hoping you wouldn't block my pop-up.
Want to see my Red Hat?
If you won't let me buy you a drink, at least let me fix your laptop.
You put the SPARC in my workstation.
You're so pretty, I wouldn't even need to use an Instagram filter if I took your photo.
Isn't your e-mail address firstname.lastname@example.org?
I'd switch to emacs for you.
What's a nice girl like you doing in a chatroom like this?
No, that's not a Logitech MX-100 in my pants, but thanks for noticing.
Nice Set of Floppies!
I think you could be an integral part of my project life cycle.
If you have an empty slot, I have the card to fill it.
WebMD says your love is contagious.
Hey, how 'bout I take off your cover and insert a bigger CPU.
I'd like to play on your laptop.
Where's the 'like' button for that smile?
You totally spiked my traffic.
You are the Apple of my i-Mac.
If you were an ISP I'd dial you all day long.
If you were an ebay auction, I'd totally 'buy it now'.
You have a trojan? hmm... I think I'll need to take a look at that backdoor.
Come to my 127.0.0.1 and I’ll give you sudo access.
I must be using Apple maps, because I keep getting lost in your eyes.
I'd get a T3 to watch your streaming video.
I'll bet my hard drive is the biggest you've ever seen.
Your homepage or mine?
Hey Baby, Let me hack your kernel.
No, that's not an iPod mini in my pocket. I'm just happy to see you.
You auto-complete me.
I didn't mean to ogle you, but I'd sure like to Google you.
I was wondering if you'd like to go back to My-Space, so I can Twitter with your Yahoo, until I Google all over your Facebook?
If you ever need to get rid of a trojan, don't hesitate to call me!
You're making me feel like I have something in common with these pop-up ads.
What's the difference between a crush and a Facebook account? [what?] I'm not rapidly developing a Facebook account on you.
I need to hop over to Facebook for a second to change my status to smitten.
What do you say we play a game of "Words With More Than Friends?"
Roses are #ff0000, violets are #0000ff, all my base are belong to you.
Need me to unzip your files?
Are your pants a compressed file? Because I'd love to unzip them!
I googled your name earlier... I clicked on 'I'm Feeling Lucky.'
How about we go home and you handle my exception?
If we were connected on Linkedin, I'd endorse you all night long.
I wish you were Broadband, so I could get high-speed access.
Girl, you are hotter than the bottom of my laptop.
I'd ask if you come here often, but I already stalk you on FourSquare.
Computer techs have skilled fingers if you know what I mean.
physics & Science Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines about Physics and Science
That dress would look even better accelerating towards my bedroom floor at 9.8 m/s2
What do you say we use my lever to shift your center of mass?
Does your skin feel burnt? Because I think you must have just fallen down from heaven, and re-entry would have caused some problems for you.
I might be a physics major, but I'm no Bohr in bed.
Your lab bench, or mine?
Your eyes have a perfect wavelength of 563.4 nm.
Don't you hate it how the coyote always remains suspended in midair until he looks down? It's just SO misleading.
Hey baby. It's massive. You know what I'm talking about.
What's your resonance frequency?
Wanna dance? I can really put your inertia in motion.
I have E=mc2 tattooed on my ass. Wanna see?
Wanna couple our equations tonight?
Can I have your significant digits?
I haven't gotten laid in 4 years, 3 months, and 12 days, plus-or-minus 2 days. Would you care to check my error bars?
Did you swallow a magnet? Because you're attractive.
Top quark or bottom quark?
You're more special than relativity.
My last partner wasn't very stable. She spontaneously decayed last week and left me for a neutrino.
I know the spring constant for my mattress. Wanna take some data?
How do you feel about group experiments?
Like the ideal vacuum, you're the only thing in my universe.
Heisenberg was wrong. I'm certain about what you're doing tonight.
Those other guys said that your eyes shine like stars. But can they explain how they shine with equal brightness?
According to the second law of thermodynamics, you're supposed to share your hotness with me.
Even if there were no gravity on Earth, I'd still fall for you!
Let's exchange fermions!
Engineers don't know the first thing about pleasing a woman. Friction alone can't get the job done.
You and Me = Grand Unification
Why don't we measure the coefficient of static friction between me and you?
In my bed, it's perpetual motion all night long, baby.
Two large masses that are close together are supposed to radiate gravitational waves. I think that you're a big part of that.
I'm attracted to you like the Earth is attracted to the Sun - with a large force inversely proportional to the distance squared.
I'm hung like a Foucault pendulum.
Math Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines about Math for Math Lovers
I wish I was your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves.
My love for you is like a concave up function because it is always increasing.
How can I know so many hundreds of digits of pi and not the 7 digits of your phone number?
I wish I was your second derivative so I could investigate your concavities.
You and I would add up better than a Riemann sum.
Hey baby, what's your sine?
I need a little help with my Calculus, can you integrate my natural log?
By looking at you I can tell you're 36-25-36, which by the way are all perfect squares.
You fascinate me more than the Fundamental Theorem of Calculus.
Are you a 90 degree angle? 'Cause you are looking right!
My love for you is like pi... never ending.
I'd like to plug my solution into your equation.
Since distance equals velocity times time, let's let velocity and time approach infinity, because I want to go all the way with you.
I am equivalent to the Empty Set when you are not with me.
I don’t like my current girlfriend. Mind if I do a you-substitution?
I can figure out the square root of any number in less than 10 seconds. What? You don’t believe me? Well, then, let’s try it with your phone number.
Hey, baby want to Squeeze my Theorem while I poly your nomial?
i'm not being obtuse, but you're acute girl.
I don't know if you're in my range, but I'd sure like to take you back to my domain.
Are you a 45 degree angle? Because you're acute-y.
My love for you is like y=2^x... exponentially growing.
I'll take you to your limit if you show me your end behavior.
Can i explore your mean value?
The derivative of my love for you is 0, because my love for you is constant.
I'm good at math... let's add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply!
Our love is like dividing by zero... you cannot define it .
If you were a graphics calculator, i'd look at your curves all day long!
I've been secant you for a long time.
If I'm sine and you're cosine, wanna make like a tangent?
Meeting you is like making a switch to polar coordinates: complex and imaginary things are given a magnitude and a direction.
Being without you is like being a metric space in which exists a cauchy sequence that does not converge
My love for you is a monotonically increasing unbounded function
You are the solution to my homogeneous system of linear equations.
I heard you're good at algebra - Could you replace my X without asking Y?
Are you a math teacher? Because you got me harder than calculus.
i'll take you to the limit as X approaches infinity.
Your name is Leslie? Look, I can spell your name on my calculator!
Let's take each other to the limit to see if we converge
You must be the square root of two because I feel irrational around you.
Let me integrate our curves so that I can increase our volume
If i were a function you would be my asymptote - i always tend towards you.
Your beauty cannot be spanned by a finite basis of vectors.
I wish i was your problem set, because then I'd be really hard, and you'd be doing me on the desk.
My love is like an exponential curve - it's unbounded
My love for you is like a fractal - it goes on forever.
My love for you is like the derivative of a concave up function because it is always increasing. we're going to assume this concave up function resembles x^2 so that slopes is actually increasing.
I hope you know set theory because i want to intersect and union you
You've got more curves than a triple integral.
Honey, you're sweeter than pi.
If you were sin^2x and I was cos^2x, then together we'd make one.
Baby, you're like a student and I'm like a math book... you solve all my problems!
My friends told me that I should ask you out because you can't differentiate. Do you need math help?
Wanna expand my polynomial?
biology & Chemistry Pickup Lines
Pickup Lines for Biology and Chemistry Lovers
If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.
You're so hot, you denature my proteins.
Can I be the phasor to your electron and take you to an excited state?
Are you made of Copper and Tellurium? Because you are Cu-Te
Do you have 11 protons? 'Cause you're Sodium fine!
Do you like Science? Because I've got my ion you!
You must be gibberelin, because I'm experiencing some stem elongation.
You make my anoxic sediments want to increase their redox potential.
Are you made of Nickel, Cerium, Arsenic and Sulfur? Because you've got a NiCe AsS!
Hey baby, will a little more alcohol catalyze this reaction?
Didn't you know that chemists do it periodically on the table?
I bet you're like calcium bicarbonate - if I get you wet, the reaction will be explosive!
Are you made of Fluorine, Iodine, and Neon? 'Cause you are F-I-Ne
Me and you would undergo a more energetic reaction then Potassium and water.
Are you a compound of Beryllium and Barium? Because you're a total BaBe.
Im more attracted to you then F is attracted to an electron.
I will fondle your vesicles while you caress my golgi body.
I want to work on your leucine zipper with my zinc fingers.
If you were oxygen, I would be an alkali metal so i could get in you and explode!
We fit together like the sticky ends of recombinant DNA.
You are the photon to my photosystem: you excite my electron until I reach my reaction centre.
You're hotter than a bunsen burner set to full power.
If I were a neurotransmitter, I would be dopamine so I could activate your reward pathway.
Hey, wanna put your alpha helix in my beta barrel?
Hey baby, why don't you get your ligase working on my okazaki fragment and lengthen my strand.
Hey, are you an alpha carbon, because you look susceptible to backside attack!
Do you want to extract some protein from my column?
According to the second law of thermodynamics, you're supposed to share your hotness with me.
Everyone knows its not the size of the vector that matters, but the way the force is delivered.
How about me and you go back to my place and form a covalent bond?
If I was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me: smooth or rough?
We can make a mess as I've hired some lysosomes to clean up after.
My hypothalamus must be secreting serotonin because baby, I want you!
I wish I was an Ion so I could form an exothermic bond with you.
You’re so cute you make my zygomaticus muscles contract.
I wish I were Adenine because then I could get paired with U.
You’re like telophase, I admire your cleavage.
Hey baby, want to form a synapse with me and exchange neurotransmitters?
Hey baby, want to form a zygote?
It’s a good thing you've got evaporative cooling, cause I’m going to make you sweat
If I were a Shwann cell, I'd squeeze areound your axon and give you a fast action potential.
Want to be my substrate/enzyme?
If my right leg is the cell wall and my left the membrane, do you want to be the cytoplasm?
If you were a concentration gradient I'd go down on you.
If you were C6, and I were H12, all we would need is the air we breathe to be sweeter than sugar.
Whenever I am near you, I undergo anaerobic respiration because you take my breath away
I want to stick to u like glue-cose.
You must be the one for me, since my selectively permeable membrane let you through.
Can I be your enzyme? because my active site is dying for a chemical reaction.
You give me more jolt than a mitochondria!
Right now we’re just two RNA, but maybe we could transcribe together and become DNA.
I have a smooth endoplasmic reticulum but know that I like it rough, if you know what I mean.
I also prefer my ribosomes bound tight. Spin me round with your basal body and make sure it's turgid.
Do you like aerobic respiration as much as I do?